When...

When do I no longer have to remember to cover up my kids at night?

When did I look away at my beautiful little girl for so long that she became a women?

When was it that I became afraid to let my kids play outside in our yard?

When did I start looking at everyone, expecting them to harm me or my kids?

When is it no longer acceptable (and legal) to walk around naked in front of your kids?

When is the quota met for "how many times do I have to tell you?"

When can I stop worrying about whether my belly hangs out and my boobs are sagging?

When can I accept that my toddlers won't shut up and my teenagers won't talk to me?

When did buying a pair of underwear and a bra cause you to think that you are taking food out of your children's mouth?

When did "guilt" become a constant companion in my life?

When did not giving your child a cell phone, mp3 player, Wii/playstation, car, access to your bank account, and a credit card qualify as bad parenting?

When does the curse end that my mother gave me..."You will have kids just like you!"?

When was it that I realized my parents were full of crap? How old am I now?

When did spanking become a bad thing?

When was it that I had money to go play?

When did I stop chewing on my children's toes?

When I get to old to remember, will you do it for me?

When will it be cheaper again to buy a gallon of gas than eat at McDonalds?

When will I have to stop vacuuming because the french fries are growing?

When will we have a president that doesn't suck?

When will we have a government that keeps a better budget than I do?

When we realized that our impact isn't measured in years, but in the people we touch?

When are we going to realize there is a cure for high gas prices, but that would require us not using our cars, can we do that?

When are we going to realize that a chain email doesn't bring you luck or money, just a reason for the people who you forwarded it to a reason to return the favor, in spades?