Okay, I've always considered myself pretty savvy with anything electronic or along those lines. I can program a VCR, wire my own stereo system, write computer programs, and work through a Microsoft issue on the computer...but I have realized, I am reaching that time. You know, that time when you are getting too old to keep up with the tech-life.
Sure, I can text, but it takes me FOREVER. I can even do it on the road while I am driving...(don't tell the cops!) usually finishing a 30 word (all written out, of course) essay by the time I have reached Tacoma. Then I watch my daughter whip messages back and forth like gun fire. It amazes me! There is even a special way to hold the phone/mobile so you can do it faster, I haven't mastered that at all. And, wait for this, I now know I am old...I don't want to. There is going to be a new carpal tunnel syndrome...something like text thumb syndrome or mobile wrist syndrome.
But I just can't get over the spelling! I went to school and even college so I could learn proper English, speaking or writing. Now all I see is Spktxt! Kids learning the quickest way to write, but is it grammatically correct or even spelled correctly? Heck no! Now, I just heard on the news that a school is teaching kids to write words and sentences phonetically...geez whiz, it's no wonder we rank so low on the education ladder. Can you imagine competing on a world level by text writing? Shudder to think so.
So I must say that I am keeping up as much as my deteriorating body can. I can still sit at a computer and work code and noodle out the Microsoft issues, but I don't think I'll ever get a laptop. Those little mouse pads kill me. So as things get smaller, more intricate and faster, I will continue to get bigger across my backside and try to keep up. :D
Monday, August 18, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Rumors
Nothing infuriates me more than being accused of something that I haven't done...and then being in trouble for it. Ugh!!! I have discovered that even in America you can be tried and convicted on a thought. Not in a court of law, mind you, but in a rumor. The subtltey of it is what is the most cutting to it's power. There is always a grain of truth, especially to get people to buy it, but the teller has so much ability to add what she wishes.
Words can damage so many things, people or situations. Look at many politicians that have lost races or careers based upon a rumor. The story always gets blown out of porportion because it's always more juicy to add your own twist, so then the truth is so mired in bullshit that you can't possilby see what it was that really started.
I watch my daughter navigate the halls of her middle school and see the viciousness of the girls she must contend with. I know this brings out that particular trait within her, just to survive. I see it everyday when she comes home, wearing it like a cloak to protect her while she is "learning". I've read Queenbees and Wannabees and have seen it broken down into it's elements, so on a analytical level, it makes sense.
But what attounds me, we women never grow out it. Every situation I have encountered, there is still that dynamic that surrounds women. Why? There are those who don't play the "game", but they probably never did or maybe they just grew up. I said "we" because I was very good at it in school...so hateful, I look back and wish I could have been different. I know that I can't, I just take it and learn and hope to be a better person and more importantly pass this onto my daughters. So, I'll take this, learn and grow...what else can I do?
Words can damage so many things, people or situations. Look at many politicians that have lost races or careers based upon a rumor. The story always gets blown out of porportion because it's always more juicy to add your own twist, so then the truth is so mired in bullshit that you can't possilby see what it was that really started.
I watch my daughter navigate the halls of her middle school and see the viciousness of the girls she must contend with. I know this brings out that particular trait within her, just to survive. I see it everyday when she comes home, wearing it like a cloak to protect her while she is "learning". I've read Queenbees and Wannabees and have seen it broken down into it's elements, so on a analytical level, it makes sense.
But what attounds me, we women never grow out it. Every situation I have encountered, there is still that dynamic that surrounds women. Why? There are those who don't play the "game", but they probably never did or maybe they just grew up. I said "we" because I was very good at it in school...so hateful, I look back and wish I could have been different. I know that I can't, I just take it and learn and hope to be a better person and more importantly pass this onto my daughters. So, I'll take this, learn and grow...what else can I do?
Friday, July 18, 2008
My Friend
How many people do we have in our lives that are truly our friends? A friend that you can call at 2am and they will answer because it's you. A friend that will listen to you blubber, ramble or chatter about anything, because it's you. I guess I am lucky, because I have a couple of people in my life that fits that bill. I can't imagine my life without them. There has been others that have come and gone in my life I had hoped we would be close, but alas no. So I developed a hierarchy of friendship:
Siamese Twin Friend - This is the person you love to hug and talk with. Nothing is sacred, you have both seen the worst and best of each other...and still like them. This is the person who you want raising your kids, the first person you want to tell you've won the lottery, the person you ask when something strange is growing on your body and the person you sign on for your living will. You can't imagine a day without talking with them and they are probably the first numbers before 911 on your speed dial.
Secret-Keepers - This is a person who has probably known you for a long time. Who has one or more delicious secrets on you and you probably have some on them. This person can be a family member, spouse or someone you grew up with. You generally stay in touch with them and are privy to a lot of details in their lives, but not all. There is a line in this relationship, such as, you would call them if you were dying but they may not be the first call. This is still a close and intimate relationship but not as close as a Siamese friend would be.
Live-In - This is a person that you have or are living with. These people can exist as Siamese or below that because living with someone creates a bond that you may not share with another. Sometimes these people can be spouses, friends and/or family members. This is an intimate relationship because you get to see what they are really like when they are not "trying" to impress you...and you them. Where they put their dirty laundry, how much of a pig they really are, do they shower as often as they should, things like that. Despite the intimacy, you both "do your own thing".
Borrower - This is a person you can call if you need something, but keep it between the normal working hours of 10am - 8pm. You have spent time together and generally get on well, the conversation has usually 2-3 main topics that you share. This is a nice safe relationship because it doesn't really require too much emotional depth, it's easy and safe. You can usually borrow things from them and visa-versa, such as clothes, lawn equipment, cars. These types of friends are nice to have as neighbors.
Co-Worker - This is a person that you work with on a pretty regular basis. You are friendly with this person and share general information about your lives. Sometimes you get together outside of work, movies, drinks, etc. This person can develop into more but usually not. You both share a common point in your lives and once that connection is gone, the friendship dwindles. Some try to maintain, but without that daily dose that made the union, it just becomes to difficult and usually drops off within months.
I'll-Drink-to-That - These are the friends you drink with. Usually more than one, because drinking in a group is so much more fun! They are the life of the party, or maybe it's you, but beyond that you have no idea what they are like. Sometimes you see them at their worst, puking or sputtering about life, but you take it in stride because that is part of the party code. You care enough about them that you don't want to see them drink-and-drive.
Dude - This a person you see at different functions, events or gatherings. You definitely know their name and generally like them, but really don't see each other much beyond that. Ironically this can be family members as much as a friend. You share something, but it is kind of distant.
Whoya - This person is a friend of a friend. Comes with a package deal, sometimes with a spouse or another friend. You might like them but when it comes down to it, you won't pursue a relationship beyond where it is.
Parental - This is a person you are friendly to because your kids like each other. Generally you share small talk and visit while your kids play. The occasion you see them usually occur around birthdays, school functions, sporting events, club meetings or at the grocery store. You might remember their name, but have to think about it. These people can move up the list into another friend category but probably not. Backgrounds, personal philosophies, religion usually play a factor into not maintaining the friendship.
Most people float around the bottom of the list, sometimes straddling more than one category, but very few make it to the top 3. Sort of like the cream rising in your friendship. I have struggled with this in my head for a long time. What makes a friend? Why do some exist where they are and some don't? If you don't have people in your top three, what does that mean for you? If you have a lot...are you being real? After my kids, my friends play a serious role in my life, and make a dramatic effect on my life. I have discovered that if I don't get "out" more and expand my horizons then my list of friends dwindles. And to top that...I am getting older, which means they will start to die off as well, so..."make new friends, but keep the old..."
Siamese Twin Friend - This is the person you love to hug and talk with. Nothing is sacred, you have both seen the worst and best of each other...and still like them. This is the person who you want raising your kids, the first person you want to tell you've won the lottery, the person you ask when something strange is growing on your body and the person you sign on for your living will. You can't imagine a day without talking with them and they are probably the first numbers before 911 on your speed dial.
Secret-Keepers - This is a person who has probably known you for a long time. Who has one or more delicious secrets on you and you probably have some on them. This person can be a family member, spouse or someone you grew up with. You generally stay in touch with them and are privy to a lot of details in their lives, but not all. There is a line in this relationship, such as, you would call them if you were dying but they may not be the first call. This is still a close and intimate relationship but not as close as a Siamese friend would be.
Live-In - This is a person that you have or are living with. These people can exist as Siamese or below that because living with someone creates a bond that you may not share with another. Sometimes these people can be spouses, friends and/or family members. This is an intimate relationship because you get to see what they are really like when they are not "trying" to impress you...and you them. Where they put their dirty laundry, how much of a pig they really are, do they shower as often as they should, things like that. Despite the intimacy, you both "do your own thing".
Borrower - This is a person you can call if you need something, but keep it between the normal working hours of 10am - 8pm. You have spent time together and generally get on well, the conversation has usually 2-3 main topics that you share. This is a nice safe relationship because it doesn't really require too much emotional depth, it's easy and safe. You can usually borrow things from them and visa-versa, such as clothes, lawn equipment, cars. These types of friends are nice to have as neighbors.
Co-Worker - This is a person that you work with on a pretty regular basis. You are friendly with this person and share general information about your lives. Sometimes you get together outside of work, movies, drinks, etc. This person can develop into more but usually not. You both share a common point in your lives and once that connection is gone, the friendship dwindles. Some try to maintain, but without that daily dose that made the union, it just becomes to difficult and usually drops off within months.
I'll-Drink-to-That - These are the friends you drink with. Usually more than one, because drinking in a group is so much more fun! They are the life of the party, or maybe it's you, but beyond that you have no idea what they are like. Sometimes you see them at their worst, puking or sputtering about life, but you take it in stride because that is part of the party code. You care enough about them that you don't want to see them drink-and-drive.
Dude - This a person you see at different functions, events or gatherings. You definitely know their name and generally like them, but really don't see each other much beyond that. Ironically this can be family members as much as a friend. You share something, but it is kind of distant.
Whoya - This person is a friend of a friend. Comes with a package deal, sometimes with a spouse or another friend. You might like them but when it comes down to it, you won't pursue a relationship beyond where it is.
Parental - This is a person you are friendly to because your kids like each other. Generally you share small talk and visit while your kids play. The occasion you see them usually occur around birthdays, school functions, sporting events, club meetings or at the grocery store. You might remember their name, but have to think about it. These people can move up the list into another friend category but probably not. Backgrounds, personal philosophies, religion usually play a factor into not maintaining the friendship.
Most people float around the bottom of the list, sometimes straddling more than one category, but very few make it to the top 3. Sort of like the cream rising in your friendship. I have struggled with this in my head for a long time. What makes a friend? Why do some exist where they are and some don't? If you don't have people in your top three, what does that mean for you? If you have a lot...are you being real? After my kids, my friends play a serious role in my life, and make a dramatic effect on my life. I have discovered that if I don't get "out" more and expand my horizons then my list of friends dwindles. And to top that...I am getting older, which means they will start to die off as well, so..."make new friends, but keep the old..."
Monday, June 30, 2008
To my daughter, Quinn
Hello sweatheart,
Let me start by saying that "You are amazing!!!" I am in awe of you every day that you have graced my life. I feel so incredibly blessed to have you in my life and to share such a wonderful relationship that we do. I know you think I am corny, but I really do love you and thank God for you!
I cherish the time I have with you, even despite those days when I could sit on you, throw things at your head or just bury my head in a pillow so I don't hear you. :D
I love your smile and how it lights up your whole face, it is so your dad's! Makes me nostaglic for our relationship we had that made you. I admire your quick wit and humor, even when you are directing it at me. I adore the way you still need me, which I know it will slowly decrease as you get older. I am amused at your determination to stump, challenge or just see if you can best me, and you won't until you are old enough to meet those consequences that I protect you from. I am ravaged by the hurt others put on you and those you take on yourself that I can't protect you from. I befuddled by some of the choices you make, but know you need to make them and not to stop you, because then it would not allow you to grow into the woman you are meant to be. I am eager to see what kind of person you will become, because I now see the potential, like half-formed clay that turns into a priceless vase with time and loving care. I am pleased at the choice and thoughts you have expressed, because I know that you are listening and haven't shut me out. I am dazzled at how beautiful you are becoming on the outside, but how beautiful you have been on the inside for as long as I have known you. I am proud of you when you take the "high" road and protect those less fortunate than yourself, despite the fallout, and know that when you don't, you will know next time. I am humbled when you are better as a big sister to your siblings than I am a parent, I learn from you everytime. I am stumped when you switch from my little girl to a woman within 3 seconds and then back again, annoyed with me for not figuring it out, but know that I will catch up eventually. Most of all, thank you for making me a better parent, because I make my mistakes with you first and then fine tune them for your brother and sisters.
I have so many wishes for you for your future, but the most brightest is the wish for you to be happy. Not just to pursue it, but to truly feel it in your soul. To live in the moment and feel the happiness of living. Something so simple, but so incredible sweet. You know those moments that take your breath away, no matter how many breaths you take.
Let me start by saying that "You are amazing!!!" I am in awe of you every day that you have graced my life. I feel so incredibly blessed to have you in my life and to share such a wonderful relationship that we do. I know you think I am corny, but I really do love you and thank God for you!
I cherish the time I have with you, even despite those days when I could sit on you, throw things at your head or just bury my head in a pillow so I don't hear you. :D
I love your smile and how it lights up your whole face, it is so your dad's! Makes me nostaglic for our relationship we had that made you. I admire your quick wit and humor, even when you are directing it at me. I adore the way you still need me, which I know it will slowly decrease as you get older. I am amused at your determination to stump, challenge or just see if you can best me, and you won't until you are old enough to meet those consequences that I protect you from. I am ravaged by the hurt others put on you and those you take on yourself that I can't protect you from. I befuddled by some of the choices you make, but know you need to make them and not to stop you, because then it would not allow you to grow into the woman you are meant to be. I am eager to see what kind of person you will become, because I now see the potential, like half-formed clay that turns into a priceless vase with time and loving care. I am pleased at the choice and thoughts you have expressed, because I know that you are listening and haven't shut me out. I am dazzled at how beautiful you are becoming on the outside, but how beautiful you have been on the inside for as long as I have known you. I am proud of you when you take the "high" road and protect those less fortunate than yourself, despite the fallout, and know that when you don't, you will know next time. I am humbled when you are better as a big sister to your siblings than I am a parent, I learn from you everytime. I am stumped when you switch from my little girl to a woman within 3 seconds and then back again, annoyed with me for not figuring it out, but know that I will catch up eventually. Most of all, thank you for making me a better parent, because I make my mistakes with you first and then fine tune them for your brother and sisters.
I have so many wishes for you for your future, but the most brightest is the wish for you to be happy. Not just to pursue it, but to truly feel it in your soul. To live in the moment and feel the happiness of living. Something so simple, but so incredible sweet. You know those moments that take your breath away, no matter how many breaths you take.
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